………Is Love a Make-Believe💘

Since the dawn of humanity there is probably no topic which has captivated the minds of men and women more than the topic of love. Love remains a beautiful mystery which the likes of art, poetry and music have helped underscore through centuries. 💑💞💞

Ever since a young age we have been brought up to conceive true love as this great sweeping feeling that overtakes us and in true fairy-tale style we expect this will last until death do us part.
In trying  to capture this feeling people spend their whole lives. A lot of people end up having bad relationships by marrying the wrong person, thinking and believing that they have found it and this is it. Love is fascinating and complexed, a feeling…..indescribable.

True love is not what we think it is. Our everyday life experience of what we see and read says otherwise. From the most romantic couples once to the lovers we thought would last forever, are now marred by betrayal, strife, discontentment and resentment. If love is truly eternal then why are there so many break-ups and divorces ? Then the question arises is there true love ? Or is love a make-believe ?🤔

There are three stages of love:

Lust…

Attraction…

Attachment…

Science has come up with a range of theories many of which involve the bonding chemical oxytocin. As most theories go the large release of endorphins and oxytocin that we get when we are cuddling, hugging, speaking to, and having sex with the person we love, contributes to a sense of a lifelong bond to them. These feelings are contributed to by the release of dopamine which rewards us every time we achieve a goal that would please the other person. And for most part the science has agreed that these sweeping feeling of passionate devotion is mostly infatuation during the honeymoon phase of a relationship. In reality, those feelings fade quickly and both partners are left with a more quiet appreciation for one another rather than a burning or a ravenous desire.💏👫

So what is love for you..? Is it a physical need, is it an emotional need, is it a sense of longing and belonging or is it unconditional i.e. love without receiving – which to me is the true kind of love. During a conversation with some friends there was an interesting revelation, it showed me just how deeply so many people are steeped into the idea of a relationship being the ultimate happiness in their lives and how one person takes priority over everyone else in your life and majority of the time women are caught up in this dilemma. Concept of true love as romance is extremely limiting. More and more people have this misconception that the only source of great love is a romantic partner. I feel that even if one does not have that perfect partner, you can still experience many moments of fulfilment and togetherness outside of a formal relationship. Yes it would be great to find a partner where there is mutual love and appreciation, but do not make that your whole life’s mission and in the process be miserable.

When I go out people often ask me, “You look like you are totally in love and there is a spark in your eyes. So tell us who is this secret man you are hiding ?” The problem with people is that they perceive happiness to be so limited and it will only exist if there is that supposed man or woman
in your life. Romance is everyday for me and I feel it even as I am writing this blog. 🌹😍😍

I feel love when I watch the parrots kissing on my window, when I cook for my dad and watch his face when he relishes that food , when I workout and my body sweats and I feel the muscle flex, when I listen to sufi music, when I see an old couple taking a walk hand in hand and when I meet my friends. I feel love in everything and it’s love for no reason and I can’t imagine a life without this feeling. That’s the kind of energy that has begun to flow within me.💘💘🎻🎷

And once there is that positive vibe within you then you just naturally start exuding it, and it starts to affect everyone around you as well. That’s the change you need to bring within and everything becomes love itself. You feel that dopamine kind of high constantly. It’s like falling in love every day, with everyone, in every moment with everything.When you meditate daily and actively practise kindness you can increase your capacity for love and happiness and positivity starts to flow. My life has changed with this one single process of meditation and bringing love and romance within and I wish it does for everyone else too.

I feel the abundance of love so much within me that all these so-called perfect and ideal situations can exist or not. It’s all okay 🙂 My love and happiness is no more based on these factors.

No person can have everything the ideal way they imagine this life to be. There is no formula. So enjoy every little moment of that romance and love which exists in YOU first as the people, the material things, these so-called perfect situations and feelings are all transitory and momentary. That stability and solid feeling is within. The only permanence that exists is within. Discover it ….and work on that instead.

More LOVE to follow …..keep reading 😍😍💝

Just Be

Bijli

8 thoughts on “………Is Love a Make-Believe💘

  1. Love ourselves first and you will find love in the smallest of things is a philosophy I try to follow. By the way… I too look at the parrots kissing outside my window and it’s wonderful, old people on a bench calmly sitting holding hands. That’s what I call friendship. Or when my pasta makes anyone happy I feel the love.
    Loving reading your blog. Love Bijli strikes and we wait for the sequel…🌷😍follow your bliss

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  2. Once again you have hit the perfect explanation right onnnnn. Sangeeta we all strive day in day out with all our stresses around. But love yourself and that’s that. Rest of the best follows. Amennnnnn. Keep going THUNDER (Bijli) 👌

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  3. wow !! i have heard about beauty with brains..but also with a heart ?? dats a rarity and u seem to have it. Very well written article, ur thoughts clearly come out on paper and u r able to communicate with the reader. However, i would love to see you go deeper in the meaning of LOVE. What you are saying can also be compassion, attachment. Think deeper, meditate on LOVE, and do let me know. I am eagerly awaiting ur next blog. BTW Virigina Wolf in the making ?

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